There I go disappearing again. In and out of the blogworld sort of like a long lost friend. I just got a couple of comments that inspired me to write again and I wanted to thank my friend for the nudge. I wasn’t sure anyone was even out there. To see that there is gives me the warm fuzzies. Do you remember warm fuzzies? We used to make them in school and give them to our friends to make them feel good. They were furry little creatures and you would write something nice on the paper part to make someone’s day a little brighter.
I spent last night at a Christmas party with some of my dearest friends. This particular group of people fits my lifestyle right now, married with children ranging from toddlerhood to high school age. We laugh, we sing (we’re all members of the church praise team), and we come together when someone in the group needs 12 shoulders to lean on. In a couple of weeks we will bring 2007 in together just as we have brought in the previous three years. These are people I can see myself growing old with. I can see us going to the weddings of our children, comparing pictures of our grandchildren 20 years from now. They will forever be on my Christmas card list.
Spending time with these friends makes me sad in a way though. It makes me think about other friends I have had who now are too busy or live too far away for a spur of the moment get together.
There is my friend Hilary, literally my oldest friend. Her mom and my mom were best friends in high school and Hilary and I have known each other since birth. We spent our childhood summers at her house singing the songs of Crystal Gayle and the Statler Brothers at the tops of our lungs. We did karaoke before karaoke was even invented! She lives right here in the same city but now has three children that keep her on the move so we rarely get to see one another. I’m going to do my best in 2007 to change that.
My friend Jenn lives in California. I spent my teenage years visiting my aunt in CA during the summer. Not just for a week, the whole summer. Jenn was one of the neighborhood kids and we would spend our days at my aunt’s pool, laying out in the sun listening to the Go-Go’s , the Violent Femmes, and other random music of the 80’s. I think I heard “Tainted Love” and “Kiss Me Deadly” by Lita Ford at least a thousand times during those summer trips. In between summers we would write 18 page letters to each other and I always smiled when I would open my mailbox and see an envelope with “Yeeeee-Haaaaaaaawww” and “OHmyGosh!!!” written all over the back. Jenn and I lost touch for a long while but reunited several years ago and she has always given me a safe haven when I return to CA to bring my oldest daughter to see my ex husband’s family. It was with Jenn that I saw “The Notebook”, the quintessential chick flick. We email and call often but not nearly often enough. I think I’ll call her tonight.
My friend Gaylin lives in Colorado. I met her during the short six months that I lived in California way back in 1990. I applied for a job and it just so happened it was her job I was taking over. So, after I was hired, she trained me and on that very first day all of our coworkers were coming up and asking us how we knew each other. They thought for sure we were long lost friends or somehow related. We were joined at the hip for those six months and then kept in touch by phone but slowly lost contact. I was in NYC visiting my brother in 1995 when I remembered that Gaylin had an aunt who lived in Manhattan. She had an unusual last name so I took my chances and called all five of them in the NYC phone book and left messages. When I returned to the hotel after a long day of sight seeing I had a message waiting for me from Gaylin’s aunt. She gave me Gaylin’s contact info and also reminded me that it just so happened to be February 17th, Gaylin’s birthday. Within five minutes I was on the phone with my long lost friend chatting like we had just seen each other the day before. A few months later she and I took a very memorable 24 hour whirlwind trip to Seattle, WA. I documented our vacation on videotape and it makes me laugh until my stomach hurts every time I see it. Thankfully we’ve kept in contact ever since and every time I see her its as if no time has passed. Like Jenn, we email and we call but not nearly enough. Life gets in the way and days fly past.
There is my friend Terry, who lives in Nashville. He and I met right after I graduated from high school, at the U of M Catholic student center. I didn’t go to college but I went to church on campus. Terry and his brother Tim were known to be the quiet ones in the group. I found both of them to be anything but. They were a great comedy team and have pictures of both of them that bring back floods of memories of those days. Terry and I used to talk on the phone every night for hours and would take 10 minutes to say goodbye, literally. We’d start with goodbye, then adios, then aloha and so on and so on. When Terry graduated and moved back to his hometown he would send me cassette tapes of heavy metal music with himself acting as the WAKY Radio DJ. I hate heavy metal music and he knew this but it was his way of tourturing me and of course making contact so I never complained. A tape from Terry in the mail always brought a smile to my face. My husband and I now visit Nashville several times a year to see my in-laws but we rarely get to stop and visit Terry and his family. I call him when we pass by his exit and “wave” but its been almost two years since I’ve seen him face to face.
My friend Mike lives on the East Coast. He’s a private kind of guy so I won’t mention what state he lives in but I’ve been there to visit and its truly one of the most beautiful places I’ve ever seen. I felt such peace and contentment when I was there. Mike and I met on New Year’s Eve of 1985 at the Memphis Ice Arena. We dated for a short time and he was the first boy I ever truly loved. After high school he got married and joined the service and I only kept up with him through occassional news updates from a mutual friend. And then one day my phone rang. It was Mike and he was in town for a few weeks to visit family. And to my surprise he wanted to see me too. I could write about those weeks and the years that have followed for hours but I won’t because as I said, Mike is a private guy and I respect that. I also respect him, more than a lot of other people who have ever come into my life. Some of the most enlightening conversations I’ve ever had have been with him. We’ve talked about everything and we’ve talked about nothing. I miss talking to him on a more regular basis. Our chats now are few and far between and way too short for my taste. I look forward to the day when we can talk face to face again.
There are others I could mention and may do just that in another post but I have to get children out of bed and ready for school. I’ll close this with my thoughts about my friend Heather who resides in North Carolina. I’m most excited because at the end of this week, Heather will be here with her newborn son and we’ll get to spend several days together during my most favorite time of the year. Heather and I met online while planning our weddings. At first we were just two brides getting ready for a huge event in our lives. But within days we discovered that we have a long list of things in common starting with our love for ice skating. Come to find out she was born right here in Memphis, spent her summers here, and her grandmother still lived here. We’re pretty sure we were both at the Mall of Memphis ice rink at the same time when we were young and just never knew it. We were both divorced and had daughters around the same age. She came to Memphis, we met in person and the rest as they say is history. She is my soul sister. We have laughed, we’ve cried, we’ve laughed until we’ve cried. I have piles of emails that we have exchanged that I will one day turn into a book. I’ve promised her that and although it may have to wait until my children are grown, a promise is a promise.
To all of my friends near and far, you mean more to me than a few words in a blog could ever express. Each one of you has carved out a special place in my heart that can never be replaced by another. You have given me memories that I will share with my grandchildren and God willing, my great grandchildren. To each one of you, I wish you as much love and laughter and contentment as you have brought into my world. I love you all.
